Ok, so to post about something good in my life… hmmm… ;-) Naw, really, lots of good these days, just seem to keep too busy with the good. Which means it’s been a few weeks since I became an aunt again! She was born August 28th and the newest love in my life is named Vanessa, the daughter of my sister and brother-in-law. Sweet little thing born with a lot of dark hair, only 9 days after my birthday. I was also able to grace them with some free photography, ha. A few more of my favorites:
Such a sweetie. We’ve only did a really quick session with her so far, and I need to design the birth announcements, maybe here in a minute. But soon there will be actual family pictures for them. We’d better get with it, I’m anxious to fill the three frames I got for them…
So pretty much right after I posted my last entry, I got this email:
I stumbled across your blog by accident, looking for a different site. After reading your entry, I want you to know I am praying for you and to please ask for help. Make sure you tell your doctor or a counselor/therapist what is going on. You sound depressed which is not rare with little children. You are doing the hardest job in the world and it is okay to ask for help.
But since my response to “Lisa” bounced back due to fake email address syndrome, here it is:
You mean my most recent entry? I’m honestly not depressed, just a little stressed out at times. I’m actually very happy, couldn’t ask for more. Loving life.
The thing is, I really don’t know what about my entry screams “depression,” I am not depressed AT ALL. Just, yeah, stressed out sometimes. But nothing in there, to me, says hey this chick is depressed.
I swear, I am going crazy. My back still isn’t quite better yet, in fact, it’s hurting something fierce right now. I’m slow to sit down and get up, I’m slow to pick things up, and especially to chase things such as Kayleigh or the dog. With that said, I must also note that over the last week, Kayleigh’s decided she’s the boss… again. She’s been able to get out of the pack n play for quite a while now but hasn’t done it since the time she tried to get out of the crib (while I wasn’t here) and fell. But suddenly, she graduated to getting out onto the couch then she started getting out without the couch, now when we use the pack n play to “gate” off the space between the couch and love seat (which has previously worked very well), she’s gone to climbing over the arm of the couch or love seat to get around it, OR just plain pushing it out of the way. She also pushes the gate pieces of the dog’s “corral” around as well as another large (actual) gate we have. Since the gate doesn’t open enough to span the doorway between the center room and the living room, my father-in-law put together a couple of boards with an old towel for padding to fill in that extra space. Kayleigh just pushes it all down. AND she can open the back door. Nothing is sacred anymore and I’m having a hard time keeping up.
And with all of this in mind, Kayleigh is just as bad as Elijah (if not worse) at learning her lessons. No matter what happens or how many times I tell her no or stop or whatever, she doesn’t get it, she just keeps going for it. I’ve put her in her crib with some toys and such because I can’t take it anymore for a while.
All of this wouldn’t be so bad if it was just a little bit during the day, but it’s constant. She just won’t give it up. She refuses to play with her toys and only wants to leave the house or do things she’s not supposed to. I wouldn’t mind taking her outside to run around for a bit at all, but I can’t do it by myself right now, she’s too fast for me while my back is so stiff. My back has been bothering me for a week now, I just wish I would get better already. Of course, if I could keep from having to lift Kayleigh out of trouble. She’s more than twice what I’m supposed to be lifting.
Sigh, I really think I might go nuts. Someone please tell me how long this is going to last because I need to see the light at the end of the tunnel…