So far it hasn’t been TOO bad. I had a melt down Wednesday night, but it’s been the only one. And I think that was brought on because I laid there for a long time listening to the monitors, that were turned up really loudly, just emit the noise of baby moving around, not the heartbeat like they’re supposed to be. So the sounds were just really grating on my brain and drove me nuts.

But other than that…

It’s often hard for me to type a lot though, like now – this is weird. Trying to extend my arms and reach the keyboard on the pull over table without upsetting the monitor. So if I don’t answer emails very fast and stuff, that’s why! Sometimes all I can do is use the mouse and play a game or something. But even that doesn’t happen all that often. I’ve mostly spent my time doing that cross stitch and watching TV and this internet is extremely slow during the day. Cross stitch takes me a long time, too, since I can’t move as efficiently as normal.

But anyway, it’s interesting the things you don’t think about regarding bed rest, before you’re actually on it.

They’ve got me on a couple of medicines and even last night gave me an Ambien which was… interesting. I got to sleep for a bit then had to get up and go to the bathroom and let’s just say, don’t walk while you’re on Ambien. I was so dizzy! It was weird. But after that, I got to not wear the fetal monitor for a few hours and I slept SO good.

They’ve got me on these things that go on my calves and are cuffs that fill up with air intermittently. This is to make sure the blood pumps through my legs and I don’t get blood clots. They’re not all that bad. I was worried at first it would be like wearing a blood pressure cuff all the time, like when I had Elijah – and it went off every 3 minutes. After just a few times, my arm hurt so bad. The worst part of these things is that they can get hot and also, I don’t like the feel of their material on my bare feet LOL. Oh, and the other night the nurses made me sleep in them though I know the doctor said just all day to wear them, and that was incredibly annoying. Thankfully, the nurses last night didn’t make me wear them to sleep.

I’ve had both of the steroid shots and by now they have reached their maximum effectiveness. So now we are just waiting. They did hurt, but not as bad as my wonderful friends made it sound like! Maybe I went in over prepared and expected them to be worse, ha. Actually, I find that that can be a pretty good technique, I think that’s how I went into childbirth with E and I didn’t think it was so bad at all. These shots are for the baby’s developing lungs, though. I got to learn about that, too, how they actually help. Pretty interesting. And the nurse told me why they sting so bad – because the liquid is really thick and goes right in your muscle, but you just work that muscle and it’s all fine as it disperses it.

But anyway, I don’t know if I mentioned this before – but what they didn’t tell me before I was in here, was that when I get out, I’m apparently going to need physical therapy. I know that I’ve already lost muscle mass, at least the stuff I gained from working out throughout 2007/8, but apparently after all this it will be bad enough I’ll have to have therapy. Well, whatever, really, that’s the least of my worries I think, but it’s just weird because I didn’t think about that before at all! It also has to do with back problems. I have those already, yay, not to mention back problems from pregnancy and now back problems from being in bed all the time. My butt hurts quite a bit, too, and the other day my back hurt so bad it literally hurt through to my chest. It was not fun.

Visitors are fun though :)
Even just if they come in and can only sit and talk a few minutes. Great to see a familiar face. I’m starting to get to know some of the nurses but I haven’t really had any repeats yet and they don’t always write their names down for me (actually, only 3 have) so I often can’t remember their names either!

Just had another visitor lol. The dietitian haha.
She was concerned about my weight loss over this pregnancy. But I think I’m about a pound from being back where I was pre-pregnant. She also wanted to make sure I was getting plenty of calcium and fiber. She gave me a menu where I can order from the cafe and not just “room service.” She says they let long term pregnancy people do that, so she comes after you’ve been in about a week. So yay, more choices! I’m sure there will be a post on hospital food forthcoming. :)

Here’s some more pics, click through for descriptions:

We had an appointment at the first hospital for an ultrasound and to pick up our paperwork. They sent me there first because the doctor who’s patient I am considered was on staff there for today.

I really wasn’t expecting any changes during the ultrasound but suddenly the ultrasoundist said, “wait, wasn’t this baby always head up?” I sort of snapped to attention and was like, “yeah…” She checked her little thing to make sure it was pointing the right way and then she was like, “well now she’s head down!” She was clearly excited and surprised! I was like “YES!!” Even if I still end up with a c-section, this is freaking awesome. The doctors and ultrasoundists have always said that because of the loss of fluid, there was really not any chance of her being able to flip around.

So when the doctor came in, he had his usual not surprised attitude, but Steve took some of the things he said as surprised and re-thinking things. I asked him, “so does this mean if I get to 34 weeks, that there’s a possibility I can have a normal delivery?” He said, “Not possibility, there is a probability.” To which I had to admit I didn’t know the difference and he said, “Possibility means there’s a chance, probability means it’s greater than 50%.” So, like friggin A man.

So from there, we got some lunch and went to the second hospital. They’ve admitted me to an actual labor & delivery room. The doctor had said that we’ll monitor all the time for a week then “re-evaluate.” I really don’t know what that means and I doubt it means I’ll be going home after a week but maybe it means I won’t have to have the monitors on ALL the stinking time. Because I tell you what, I’ve only been here for like 7 hours and I am reminded just how annoying these things are! And this child does not like them, she keeps moving out of the way so they’re constantly adjusting and sometimes it takes a long time to get it on there! Right now, it’s not finding her heartbeat so they’ll be in before long. And it’s not my fault! :P

Anyway, they were initially going to give me an IV with antibiotics for 2 days but then decided that I’ve made it five and a half weeks after my water breakage and was so “stable” that it wasn’t needed. GOOD THING, I was not looking forward to an IV, it really makes my whole arm unusable. They did make me take the blood glucose test which is never fun but it wasn’t that bad except for when my body decided to cough while I was in the middle of a drink and the stupid stuff went up my nose from the back and I nearly threw up. :) But then you know, they take your blood and they checked that and I am FINE there. Good, too, because apparently the steroid shots can raise your blood sugar, or DO raise it, so they have to be very careful if you have diabetes. They also took a tube to test my white blood count which was fine, too. No infections. Giving the blood wasn’t bad at all this time, the lady was real gentle. The tape, however, left me with a nice purple welt!

Yes then there was the steroid shot which, y’all know I hate needles. Of course, who LIKES them? But I guess I was anticipating it to be so bad that it wasn’t as bad as I thought. I hope that tomorrow it will be the same or better. It does sting but she told me to move my muscles there to get it dispersed faster and it also helps not feeling it when you’re moving.

So I’m alone now, but it’s ok, been a long day. Just entertaining myself until it’s time to try to sleep. :)

He made me decide right then and there when to go in the hospital, though, which contradicted what he told me on Friday when he said we could take it day by day and decide a day of, if we wanted to. He was all, well you need to decide, and when I said Steve hadn’t made up his mind either, he was like, well you need to do it, then. So then he tells me, “how about this, you come in one week or two, which is it?” Something in me said “two!!!!!” so I said two.

So now I go in on the 23rd. I’ll have to go to one hospital for an ultrasound and paperwork ’cause apparently that’s where the doctor is scheduled to be that day. Then I go to the one I’ll be in for, possibly, the next 8 weeks.

They’ll give me one steroid injection then and then another 24 hours later. And they monitor baby 24/7. And we wait.

A thing I got about the hospital today says this:

“Occasionally, it’s necessary for a mom with a high-risk pregnancy or symptoms to need extra care. This may require a hospital stay on bed rest or limiting activities to help the baby grow safely. If this is necessary during your pregnancy, our exclusive While You Are Waiting program provides the support you need while away from home. Our committed nurses and professionals are focused on helping you find positive ways to handle the extra time on your hands, and lessen the stress and worry, whie taking special care of you and your baby. We’ve created a unique healing environment to support you in every way possible.

– Private rooms and flexible room service meals help you feel at home.
– Education classes are provided at your bedside, like childbirth preparation and newborn care.
– Keep your hands busy with creative activities: learn to knit, enjoy scrapbooking, or try painting and journaling.
– Stay connected to family and friends on our laptops with WIFI.
– Caring Bridge – a private, personalized web site makes it easy to stay in touch.
– Special support groups are available for dads and siblings.
– Bedside salon and massage services when you need a little pampering!”

SO I guess that’s me!
My first question is: when will someone teach me to knit? :) I’ve been wanting to learn really.

And though they say keep connected with their laptops, I’m hoping I’ll be able to connect mine to the wi-fi. And if that’s the case, I’ll have even more to keep me entertained. I’ll probably even get Netflix or something for watching stuff on my PC. Though Steve insists they must have a DVD “rental” place in there since we found a DVD in a drawer last time, but who knows. Just depends on how things go. There’s also that Amazon Unbox which is not bad.

I’ve got a book to read that my friend gave me last week. Kinda been saving it for my hospital time. But if I get into it it won’t take me long to finish it anyway. I also am putting some photos on my little scrapbooking drive, so maybe I can do that. And I ordered two cross stitch kits last night, so yes, plenty of things to keep me occupied.

As you can guess I’m trying to actually make this some what fun for me. Might make it easier. Rather than dreading the 23rd, I’m trying to look forward to it. Then, if nothing else, the next two weeks won’t be filled with my dreads of what is coming.

Oh the doctor did say again that there’s a chance that between now and when I go in the hospital that I could go in labor and that we’d probably lose the baby. BUT then he said it was a VERY small chance and most likely won’t happen. I guess they assume that because I didn’t go into labor within that first week after my water breaking that I probably won’t for some time now, or maybe never on my own, who knows?

However, I may have caught Elijah’s stomach bug because all yesterday and now so far today, any time I’ve been up moving around, I’ve felt really queasy. Only thrown up twice though, and then pretty much before I ate anything. But it’s been a feeling that’s lasted all day. And, like Elijah was late Thursday and all Friday, I don’t have any fever. But then again, I’m supposed to just be lying around anyway, so, whatever.

My hospital visit could start as early as this coming Saturday and could go for as long as 10 weeks, or until around May 15th, as now they’ve said they will not let me go past 34 weeks. That’s a long time.

Things would just be so much easier if I knew exactly which date I would go into labor, or they’d need to take the baby, etc., then I’d just go to the hospital the day before. :) But alas, life is not like that!

Friday they did an ultrasound at the specialists’ office (well, what turned out to be that hospital’s perinatal center) which showed the same results: no fluid or next to none surrounding the baby but she had some in her bladder.

They want us to decide when I should go in the hospital. I’m kinda at the point where I’ve resigned myself to say at 24 weeks (so in about a week and a half from now) but Steve still hasn’t made up his mind. It’s one of those things that, eh… Choice A seems like a no brainer and then Choice B also seems like a no brainer, so you’re liable to go back and forth between the two choices. Or three choices, or whatever. Either way, though, no matter what you decide, it almost feels like you’re trying to play God. But a decision has to be made. I just kinda want someone else to tell me what to do.

Other than that. Nothing.

I’m still doing the bed rest thing. Elijah has a fever now. He acts completely fine most of the time, but he has this fever. I guess if it’s not broken tomorrow, we’re going to arrange for him to go to the doctor. We’re taking extra precautions so that I don’t get whatever it is. That is the absolute last thing I need.

I was really upset Friday, though, after talking to the doctor about it all. It bothered me all day, everything from the steroid shots to c-sections to possible early birth complications. I’m better now but who’s to say I won’t get so nervous again? Especially when the time comes and especially if I have to go for that c-section and I’m all alone?

In other news, the dog won’t leave me alone and he’s driving me insane…

Roses and carnations from a friend…

The fact that it’s midnight thirty and Sarah is here to be my nurse and we’re up watching a movie…

The fact that another friend has invited Elijah to come spend the day at her house with her son who is his age while I am at the next doctor appointment…

The hope that my next appointment will show some improvement…

Here is tonight’s ultrasound. There has been no change since last Friday. But, like everyone keeps telling me, at least things aren’t any worse!

I am feeling better than I was 12 hours ago and hoping that tomorrow will not be a bad day. Baby has been active tonight, despite being very inactive all day, and that makes me feel better, too.

Oh, and this, this makes me smile, too…